I couldn't tell you why I need so much to be suffering all the time but I get the conclusion that I really need it, right? It's like everybody needs to drink and to feed, it's simple. And I'm not upset or worried or concerned about it. 

I have something inside that never lets me sleep at night. I have something really bad inside which makes me be so bad in this love stuff. It's just a conclusion it's not a suicide note. But I think I should write one someday. 

I'm sure I don't need any kind of help, I'm feeling fine. Just accepting that I'm not gonna get what I want. Piece of cake.